Monday, August 02, 2010

Expectations

It was brought to my attention on the weekend, that I may have unrealistic expectations about our trip to Canada. Silly me, I thought it would be a trip without guilt. But Geoff assured me, having been away for 5 years, that it's likely to come up.

Really? I hoped that the fact that I came would placate these people.

So now I'm stressed. And that's stupid. What good does it serve me to be stressed about people being pissed at me? I can't change how people will feel.

In any case, I'm pushing that aside and looking forward to seeing my family. If they wanna pay for me to travel there more frequently, maybe we can start a fund.

I just really wanted my grandparents to meet Miles. And I want to visit my dad's grave. Though the thought of it makes me want to cry.

This may be an emotional trip.

2 comments:

janehadji said...

Life allows very few of us the leisure and money to travel as often as we'd like, and I'm sure that the people who love you will understand that. We all do the best we can! I'm glad that your son will have the opportunity to meet your grandfather. I cherish the photos I have of my young children with my grandparents, all now deceased. I hope you have a fabulous trip and that it meets all of your positive expections! And remember: visiting is a two-way street -- people can come to visit you, as well!

Cate said...

Have a great time. Remember that "an emotional trip" can be just as much good as bad. From Cate - Queen & sister of fellow Queen of Emotions. Enjoy the good ones & learn from the painful ones. Love you.